Monday, August 20, 2018

Man in Pink Dress Bemoans “Homosexual Subculture” in Church

A Disassociated Press Report, Madison, Wisconsin, August 20, 2018

by Eric Mader

A portly man in a pink dress with a flouncy pink ribbon today bemoaned the “homosexual subculture” that has infested the Catholic Church, saying this subculture was responsible for the bulk of the clergy sex abuse scandal.

The man, who identified himself as Bishop Robert Morlino of the diocese of Madison, Wisconsin made his remarks at a press conference there yesterday.

“In the specific situations at hand, we are talking about deviant sexual--almost exclusively homosexual--acts by clerics,” the bishop said to a group of around seventy attendees. “We’re also talking about homosexual propositions and abuses against seminarians and young priests by powerful priests, bishops and cardinals. We are talking about acts and actions which are not only in violation of the sacred promises made by some--in short, sacrilege--but also are in violation of the natural moral law for all. To call it anything else would be deceitful and would only ignore the problem further.”

“There has been a great deal of effort to keep separate acts which fall under the category of now-culturally-acceptable acts of homosexuality from the deplorable acts of pedophilia,” he continued. “That is to say, until recently the problems of the Church have been painted purely as problems of pedophilia--this despite clear evidence to the contrary.”

The bishop said that the Church needed to return to “calling a sin a sin” and must work vigorously on various fronts to weed out members of the clergy guilty of breaking their vows of chastity. He stated that sexually active homosexual priests had “wreaked devastation in the Church.”

After a final brief prayer, Bishop Morlino opened up to questions from those in attendance.

“You’re wearing a pink dress,” one man indicated with a shrug.

“I’m sorry,” the bishop replied, “but this is not a dress. It’s a cope, a kind of traditional Catholic vestment. The color pink is in honor of the recent festival of the Assumption of the Virgin Mary.”

There were no further questions.

Reactions to the bishop’s statements were mixed.

One Madison man, Greg Snyder, 38, felt the bishop should have chosen different attire.

“He can make whatever assumptions he likes about Mary, that’s his right,” Snyder said after the talk. “But if he wants to convince us he’s not himself part of this gay mafia preying on children, he needs to lose that pink dress.”

Jasmyn Fleik, 27, of the Madison LGBTQ Dogma Defense Alliance, rejected the bishop’s claim that homosexual priests were the problem.

“Just because 80 percent of the victims of clerical sex abuse are boys, and just because most of the abusing priests were known to be sexually active gay men, that doesn’t at all mean homosexuality has anything to do with this crisis!” Fleik insisted, to coughs and rolling of eyes from bystanders.

“I mean, like, use your brain for once,” she added.

One woman who declined to be named but identified herself as Catholic said the bishop’s remarks were sorely needed and that he was brave to speak so clearly.

”Now we must wait to see if Pope Francis will be equally brave,” she said.

[With apologies to Bishop Morlino, who is the only American bishop so far to call a spade a spade.]

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